I went to 12 years of school, and 6 years of university for my bachelor’s. Wonder why it took me 6 years to graduate? Cuz I couldn’t stand it. I was really close to dropping out on the fourth year. If not for my best friend at the time encouraging me time and time again to be patient and just finish the last stride, I wouldn’t have my bachelor’s now, which has been completely useless in my life so far.
I studied Computer Science, out of passion and interest. I hated university so much because despite how much I’ve learned about the science of computing, my grades never reflected that. Despite my interest and curiosity, I was never allowed to learn. I was pressured to repeat what the teachers told me, in their language, to be approved of by the ones who grade me. My learning was never a priority to anyone. How rare was it that I asked a question out of pure curiosity and interest and got even a legitimate answer? How infrequently was I encouraged? I remember there was only two faculty members who gave me a smile and encouraged me to learn and develop understanding and skills in the field. Literally, just two people. Two. In all of six years, only two ever encouraged me. I’m not an anomaly. This is common. I’m one of the few who couldn’t give up. And when I tried, those around me believed in me too much to let me quit. I’m so grateful for them I wanna cry.
This is what’s so heartbreaking. How many people have lost their passions because of this? How many people killed the part of them that asked out of curiosity, and were shut down time and time again, where they inevitable learn that no one wants them to think for themselves and explore, they only want them to behave. Constantly being reminded that, no matter how old you are, no matter how smart you are, no matter how hard you try, no matter who you ally with, no matter what you do, your sovereignty as an explorer and a learner of life and nature is not to be respected, encouraged, appreciated, or taken seriously.